My parents decided to leave about 5 days into Ramadan. In case you didn't know, Ramadan is a special month where Muslims fast (or in other words don't eat or drink anything, including water) from sunrise to sunset, try to make good habits, and pray special daily prayers. At the local mosque* during Ramadan people can volunteer to provide food for the community to break their fast at sunset. It’s really fun because you can see most of your friends as well as taste foods from different nationalities. We would usually go before sunset by a bit, which was 8:00ish at the time, and stay there until taraweeh**. Since it was summer, the last prayer started around 9:45ish, so we'd leave the masjid around 11. By the time we get home we’re all hungry again. I pull some fruits from the fridge so that I can “engage the family into maintaining a healthy lifestyle” while my parents were gone, as were the things my mom wanted me to do. When I finish setting the food on the table, everyone’s done munching on what I was trying to prepare and run to their beds as an excuse not to help clean the kitchen after themselves. Because I have no other choice, I patiently clean the kitchen by myself and head straight to bed, which by that time it’s around 12:30AM.
The first prayer of the day, called Fajr, starts about an hour before sunrise. The real fasting begins the second Fajr starts.(The reason why I say “the second” is because everyone in the house is usually chugging down cups of water before the actual fasting begins.) Fajr started around 4:15ish, so as the cook for the rest of the month, I needed to get up around 3 to make the food.
Making the food isn’t the biggest problem, it’s waking the rest of the familia up. If they slept around 12AM, how do you expect them to wake up again at 3AM to eat? Waking the kids up was probably the hardest task because it took forever to wake them up. My grandpa was staying over with us but I wasn’t going to have him go through the torture of dealing with those sluggish kids, how dare me?
After finally waking them up, getting them to put a couple of bites in their mouth before time runs out, and chugging down what feels like gallons of water, everyone starts to pray while I’m the only one left in the kitchen to clean up after everyone. Because of their stubbornness, I leave my work and pray with them. They run straight to their beds like it’s their finish line in a marathon while I’m goggily-eyed, trying to quickly finish with the mess in the kitchen. It would be around 5 AM that I run to my bed like I’m about to win first place too.
Simple schedule of life the 1st couple of days after my parents left:
7:30PM- Leave the house and go to the masjid for iftar
8:00-11:00 PM- Break our fast, chill with our friends, then pray Taraweeh
11:00-11:30 PM Drive home
11:30PM-12:30AM- Prepare some healthy snack for the kids
12:30-3AM- Sleep!!!!
3-5AM- Make suhoor, wake the kids, pray, clean the kitchen
5AM-......... - Let’s keep that for another story.........
*Note:I will sometimes refer to it as the "masjid", which is the word for mosque in Arabic
**Taraweeh is a special prayer during Ramadan after the last prayer of the day.
Oh gosh, and I complain about "sleepless" nights! This is a really eye-opening post that taught me quite a bit (your asteriked terms helped a lot). It seems like a really demanding/fun schedule, but put in the context of your maternal experiences, I can only imagine the chaos! Plus, I've tried fasting for a day, and it didn't go too well...so oodles of respect to you!
ReplyDeleteWow! Your extended period of being the woman of the house must have been much more challenging given that it was during Ramadan, and a summer Ramadan at that! I am really impressed that you managed all that, Mariam. You clearly have access to a maturity beyond your years :)
ReplyDeleteThe first thing that came to mind after reading this was "... three A.M.???" If I were one of your younger siblings, I would've thrown a pillow in your face and a few rather colorful words might've escaped me. I have so much more respect for you and your siblings now. On a different note though, with all the challenges you face that month, do you think you grew stronger in your beliefs that month?
ReplyDeleteI know how hard it is to make sure your family eats healthy. My mother and I always struggle over taste vs. nutrition in our meals. Props to you for attempting such a difficult task! Also, did you really only get to sleep 2 and a half hours for the 1st couple of days without your parents? That must have made it even more tiresome to take care of the kids!
ReplyDeleteIt seems like without having parents to depend on, we are often left with no choice, and HAVE to do things that we can't procrastinate on, like going straight to bed and cleaning up after the siblings. Great job!
Oh my, Mariam. Your daily schedule while your parents were gone during Ramadan sounds tiring--I'm impressed that you had so much self-control and responsibility! I have two younger siblings and I get fed up with them all the time. I'm getting cranky just trying to imagine how keeping them to the schedule you followed would turn out (not well.) I can't imagine how hard it must have been trying to get them all to behave (while not throwing the healthy snacks you prepared at them as they ran off to bed). Especially on 2.5 hours of sleep!
ReplyDeleteThat sounds exhausting! I can't imagine trying to clean the kitchen in the wee hours of the morning. I would probably just let the dishes pile up until strange creatures started crawling around them.
ReplyDeleteThis was a really interesting post, though. Our exchange student (from Turkmenistan) has told us a little bit about Ramadan but I never quite figured out what you do during the holiday. You explained the whole schedule really well!
Your blog is so interesting to read! A 16-year-old mom... Wow, I would never be able to take on that kind of responsibilities. Surviving Ramadan AND taking care of your siblings? That is real superhuman power. I really respect you for even going through with that. It must have been sooo exhausting! How ever did you survive it?
ReplyDeleteI really like how you explain in the beginning what Ramadan is. I've always been aware of the tradition, but never knew all the specific details, like not even being able to drink water. Great post overall!